Head Coffin

I have been an avid sitter, sleeper, and non mover since my early adult years and as such my butt has always been my powerhouse. But sadly, after only a few weeks of forced activity, my left cheek muscle has strengthened an enormous amount. Although this is normal for someone in my circumstances, it’s depressing that muscles that took years to flab out can suddnely show up again in a matter of weeks. My left cheek has become remarkably toned and flexes now like the flexy backside of a active 18 year old. It looks disturbingly tight and firm and out of place attached next to my right cheek, which has retained its complete lack of muscle mass.

Just look at how wierd that is

Although my backside has gone north surprisingly fast, one group of muscles has definitely benefited from this whole ordeal. My ears have never been very strong; they were always a bit reminiscent of the underdeveloped ears of a arctic fur seal.

Look at those tiny freakish ears

But now, thanks to moving around and pulling myself up by the ears, my ears and nose muscles have become amazingly Large. Since these muscles became much more engorged very quickly I haven’t quite grown accustomed to them. They seem very foreign to me, like they don’t really belong on my body, almost as much as my super toned backend.

look at those things, I don

It will most likely take months for my cheek muscles to return to normal. In the meantime I will enjoy my new ears. I plan to continue regularly working them out, to keep my new found muscle mass, long after the second world war.

This post blatantly inspired, some may even say stolen, by this other post over here